I honestly don’t even know where to begin with this post. It was a day filled with fuckery right from the very start, really.
Okay, so I had my appointment with the psychiatrist at CAMH today. Or well, I THOUGHT I did and it ended up that the psychiatrist I was supposed to see actually resigned because they are moving across the country. That was sort of the whole fuckery of the day.
They tried to call me, but when they call it pops up “Private Number” and I never answer those because they’re usually scammers or some shit. They left a voicemail as well, but I don’t usually rush to check it for the reasons stated above.
I had originally set my alarm to go off at ten am. Which became eleven thirty…which became noon. Then I sat on my phone on social media for an hour and decided that adding my best friend from primary school on facebook and a dude I had a dream I was visiting (whom I haven’t seen since before high school ended). When I finally got out of bed, it was twelve thirty. Appointment was at two fifteen so I still had time. I drank a coffee with too much sugar in it, which in hindsight was a horrible thing to do because my nerves were beyond “on edge” and I was feeling dizzy and nauseated. I shower and when I get out, it’s now one forty. No biggie, at least I thought.
Turns out I can get there by walking in just under twenty minutes, even in the rain and feeling like I’m going to throw up. When I go to look up the address, I see the note “arrive half an hour before your appointment time”. Well, I arrived fifteen minutes early so this is a terrific start after rushing here.
I go to check in and the receptionist just goes “oh. You didn’t get our voicemails did you?” I say, “no, sorry”. She says “I’m sorry, I will try and help you because the doctor you were supposed to see isn’t here. We tried calling you.” I apologised, my fault not their’s, then she said she would try and squeeze me in with someone since I was there.
I was placed with another paychiatrist and had a whole twenty minutes, where we went over the most basic of basics, I cried. He said since I’m not in a psychosis, I was able to go and book another full hour long appointment to happen within the next couple of weeks and to keep taking the meds I’m taking now.
I go and book the appointment for three weeks from now and then filled out all the registration info. A little backwards, yes but whatever.
I then leave and go to take money out of an ATM and it just says “cancelled” as soon as I enter my PIN. Odd, so then I go to look up my bank balance and find that my online account has also been temporarily locked. Good times. I call the number to see what was going on and was told to go to my nearest branch with two pieces of ID. Great. Fraud.
Because I was exhausted and just finished bawling my eyes out, I just ended up going straight home. The bank can wait.
So, that was my day. And I’m officially an outpatient at a mental hospital.